Feeling is a Privilege

A poem and short mental perusing...

Privilege as in everybody doesn't have access to feeling.

Feelings.

Cant stomach multiple at one time even though it's part of our design.

Cant hold them. It. A feeling.

One feeling.

So they cut off access to the many.

A privilege really.

To be able to name a thing that creeps up your leg and round your back and stabs you in the neck

Wraps around like a snake

Do you know how long it would take?

For someone who's experienced suffocation and strangulation

Of love, pleasure, and pride

To come outside?

To no longer hide behind the pain and name the thing

The feeling

The truth

The roots...

Its a privilege to know

Its a privilege to grow beyond what they had determined for you

Live longer and see a whole life through

Void of feeling

Too scared of healing

Of regurgitation

of spells not breaking

Passed down like legacy

I hope you see

The privilege in feeling

All the things

In a world of feel-less human beings

But why wouldn't someone want to feel? Why would someone want to cut off access to the thing that makes us human? Differentiates us from "beast" at the very least? Makes us "sentient"- not robotic and separate from sapient, because THAT they can do. They can think about it. They can make logical connections and understand their imperfections. But feel? Feeling isn't mental. It's physical. Causes reactions uncontrolled and automatic. Feelings are somatic. So as much as they try to release, or explain, or refuse to name the thing- it appears. Out of nowhere, it seems, and can linger and disorient and ruin their dreams. Throw them completely off. Without warning because even though you know it mentally the avoidance makes it hard to see. Makes it hard to breathe. Makes it hard to be. And being is the root of feeling.